There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
And then my night got REAL pukey
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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