Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
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