We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Randomize
