maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
