So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize