I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
