just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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