He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize