I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize
