It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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