We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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