I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize