SEEEEXXX PLEASE
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
