you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
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