He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize
