Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
