Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
