it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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