You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize