I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Randomize
