I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
