My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize