It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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