Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
