I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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