she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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