love makes seman taste better
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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