Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
