it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
