did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Randomize
