Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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