Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
