Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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