Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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