Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
