Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
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