I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
