Hey man sorry I got all grabby
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
There are leaves in my underwear?
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
