Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize