why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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