Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
