the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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