Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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