dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
We smell like vodka and hangover
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize