I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
