im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Randomize
