i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Randomize
