do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
it's like iHOP with fire
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
