FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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