Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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